Top Ten ways you can tell someone has never been to a Buffet
Moderator: SMLCHNG
Posted By Parrothead Tom
AHA, first, I am sure there were very many of the "why don't you sit down" people at Jones Beach this year... My friend almost got hit by a guy down from us who complained that we "were singing to loud" and "his girlfriend couldn't hear the music" Not that they knew the words to begin with. So next year when I get my Margaritaville TQ in the gate again..NO you can't have any... Parrothead friends... I'm the idiot with all the SAND in the back of my truck handing out inflatable sharks! FINS UP!!!
AHA, first, I am sure there were very many of the "why don't you sit down" people at Jones Beach this year... My friend almost got hit by a guy down from us who complained that we "were singing to loud" and "his girlfriend couldn't hear the music" Not that they knew the words to begin with. So next year when I get my Margaritaville TQ in the gate again..NO you can't have any... Parrothead friends... I'm the idiot with all the SAND in the back of my truck handing out inflatable sharks! FINS UP!!!
Posted By NM parrothead
how about when you're coming back from a good long tequila pea in the ditch at the coors amphitheater in san diego and three gentlemen wearing balck jeans and t-shirts graciously offer you a coors light and ask,"do you know anything about this reefer band?"
How about when you see the same three guys after the concert holding themselves up after some minor margaritaville tequila poisoning, wearing concert t-shirts, and dancing around with their fins up. Keep bakin!!!
How about when you've unwisely purchased floor tickets to the buffett show in las vegas thinking it might be cool to see him up close and personal for a change, then as you fire up a number and pass it to your buddy a lady taps you on the shoulder and says, "i don't think you should be smoking that in here." Being a diplomatic parrothead you offer the smoke to her and she threatens to have you removed from the facility. The worse part is that the she devils boyfriend, fully decked out in parrothead gear does nothing to stop the non sensical ravings of his lunatic girlfriend.
how about when you're coming back from a good long tequila pea in the ditch at the coors amphitheater in san diego and three gentlemen wearing balck jeans and t-shirts graciously offer you a coors light and ask,"do you know anything about this reefer band?"
How about when you see the same three guys after the concert holding themselves up after some minor margaritaville tequila poisoning, wearing concert t-shirts, and dancing around with their fins up. Keep bakin!!!
How about when you've unwisely purchased floor tickets to the buffett show in las vegas thinking it might be cool to see him up close and personal for a change, then as you fire up a number and pass it to your buddy a lady taps you on the shoulder and says, "i don't think you should be smoking that in here." Being a diplomatic parrothead you offer the smoke to her and she threatens to have you removed from the facility. The worse part is that the she devils boyfriend, fully decked out in parrothead gear does nothing to stop the non sensical ravings of his lunatic girlfriend.
Posted By PhillyPhin
when you finally make the stumble from the parking lot to the lawn in enough time to empty the tanks, grab another drink and situate yourself all before he comes out ... only to see some guy with a blanket on the ground about halfway up the lawn start yelling crap at you about how they had been inside for 3 hours waiting for the show to start just to get seats this good
just kind of laughed a bit, informed the guy that i wouldn't block his view, but the 2000 people who still hadn't made it in probably will, told him that while he was in here waiting and getting the seat i was out in the parking lot having a blast with some of the best people on earth and on top of that still ended up like 10 feet in front of him
when you finally make the stumble from the parking lot to the lawn in enough time to empty the tanks, grab another drink and situate yourself all before he comes out ... only to see some guy with a blanket on the ground about halfway up the lawn start yelling crap at you about how they had been inside for 3 hours waiting for the show to start just to get seats this good
just kind of laughed a bit, informed the guy that i wouldn't block his view, but the 2000 people who still hadn't made it in probably will, told him that while he was in here waiting and getting the seat i was out in the parking lot having a blast with some of the best people on earth and on top of that still ended up like 10 feet in front of him
Posted By Anonymous
i organized a bus trip for the 99 alpine valley show and a few of my friends (who had never been to a buffet show, obviously) asked why everyone was starting to drink @ 10 in the morning.
those same two people (who will remain nameless)also had on brand spanking new hawaiian shirts (creases and all), so i asked them to remove their shirts and i proceeded to walk all over them and poured a few beers (don't worry, not coronas)on the shirts before i let them step foot on the bus.
and to see the look of horror on those same two people's faces when we were all trying to figure out on the bus trip to alpine who was going to be the "lucky one" deflowered in the bushes that year.
the other (and probably my favorite) tell tale sign of a virgin buffet goer is of course the complete and total blank expression on their face as bubba belts out "the lost verse"
^^s up
i organized a bus trip for the 99 alpine valley show and a few of my friends (who had never been to a buffet show, obviously) asked why everyone was starting to drink @ 10 in the morning.
those same two people (who will remain nameless)also had on brand spanking new hawaiian shirts (creases and all), so i asked them to remove their shirts and i proceeded to walk all over them and poured a few beers (don't worry, not coronas)on the shirts before i let them step foot on the bus.
and to see the look of horror on those same two people's faces when we were all trying to figure out on the bus trip to alpine who was going to be the "lucky one" deflowered in the bushes that year.
the other (and probably my favorite) tell tale sign of a virgin buffet goer is of course the complete and total blank expression on their face as bubba belts out "the lost verse"
^^s up
Posted By Anonymous
When my group and I arrived at the show a few years back, someone asked me if I knew anything about the opening act. With a puzzled look on my face, I told her that there was no opening act! She said, "Sure there is. I saw the sign out front. It said something about the Coral reefs or something." I said, "You mean the Coral Reefers?"
She said, "Yeah, that's it!" I proceded to try to explain that the Coral Reefers was Jimmy's band, not an opening act!
When my group and I arrived at the show a few years back, someone asked me if I knew anything about the opening act. With a puzzled look on my face, I told her that there was no opening act! She said, "Sure there is. I saw the sign out front. It said something about the Coral reefs or something." I said, "You mean the Coral Reefers?"
She said, "Yeah, that's it!" I proceded to try to explain that the Coral Reefers was Jimmy's band, not an opening act!
-
- Nibblin' on sponge cake
- Posts: 19
- Joined: May 13, 2001 8:00 pm
10. They bring the NY Times in the Pavilion to read before the show starts.
9. They make fun of how everyone is dressed.
8. They go to the ladies room to touch up their make-up before showtime.
7. They are embarrased by men in grass skirts.
6. They think men in coconut bras look riduclous.
5. They ask why you need a portable blender.
4. They don't want to get to the parking lot until 30 minutes before showtime.
3. They only bring chocolate chip cookies to tailgate with.
2. They don't even know how to do the moves in Fins.
1. THEY WEAR SILK DRESSES, STOCKINGS, AND HIGH HEEL SHOES AND GRIPE ABOUT GETTING BEER SPILLED ON THEM. (3 years ago at Nissan)
9. They make fun of how everyone is dressed.
8. They go to the ladies room to touch up their make-up before showtime.
7. They are embarrased by men in grass skirts.
6. They think men in coconut bras look riduclous.
5. They ask why you need a portable blender.
4. They don't want to get to the parking lot until 30 minutes before showtime.
3. They only bring chocolate chip cookies to tailgate with.
2. They don't even know how to do the moves in Fins.
1. THEY WEAR SILK DRESSES, STOCKINGS, AND HIGH HEEL SHOES AND GRIPE ABOUT GETTING BEER SPILLED ON THEM. (3 years ago at Nissan)